Thank you for the citation you linked me, Arwyn! I have added it to the list I started, hooray!

In the comment to which I am replying here, I loved the way you described the impact of people's cruel words. You explained how knowing that their words are B.S. does not necessarily make them hurt less, due to the sense of separation and the way it brings up past history. I hadn't really thought about that dynamic, but it might be true for me too if I pay attention the next time I am a recipient to such unnecessary harshness. You are a master at turning pain into beauty with your writing; you know that? 💓