What this vegan thinks of lions
Many people feel an uneasiness around the death of animals for meat — it’s not just vegans and vegetarians. I recently read this eloquent story by a proud Greek-Italian meat lover, who still had difficulty watching slaughterhouse footage.
Still, in our culture it’s easy to feel absurd for caring about the death of animals. Eating meat is so widespread, and has been for so long, that most people simply view it as inevitable.
A common argument vegetarians and vegans run into is that avoiding meat goes against nature. After all, animals eat other animals. Why shouldn’t we? For some reason…
COMIC RELIEF
6 funny things folks said to me when they had no freaking clue about my gender
I’m a transgender girl who listens more than talks. Because of this, I seem to be a magnet for people’s gender-related secrets.
But before I list the funniest confessions people told me, I should warn you about something.
Indecency warning: This article contains sexual references. The worst of which are references to my 2-week trial as a “professional phone escort.”
I took those calls, by the way, from a Tempe, AZ apartment complex that shoulda been called “Cockroach Towers.” One time I caught two cockroaches getting hanky-panky above the bathroom door. Eww.
(Honest version: Anyone with the last name Huber…
Why saying “nevermore” has been the easiest way to change my life — and it works
I’ve struggled my whole life with moderation. I wish it were easy to tell myself when to stop, how much to have, or to what degree I can indulge before no more.
It isn’t. It should be, but somehow I end up justifying “Just one more bowl of vegetables” and “Tomorrow I’ll go to bed early again.” I don’t realize the faults in my logic till it’s literally too late… 4am and I’m comatose from too much cauliflower.
Look, I know some of you probably envy that I overeat on vegetables, but it’s still a problem if you’re me!
Luckily…
Start a “When was the last time I _____?” list.
In Michelle Obama’s book Becoming, she describes the “Boot Camp” weekends she had during her time as First Lady. Every few months, she’d summon close friends to Camp David. They’d excuse themselves from their busy family and work lives with a “Sorry, everyone, I’m doing this one for me.”
When was the last time you talked with a friend for hours?
When was the last time you had a day overflowing with fitness, spent in nature, or a day to do nothing but rest?
“When was the last time I _____?” is what I consider when I’m feeling like a…
DIARY OF A RECOVERING PERFECTIONIST—MARCH 17, 2021
I personified my creativity to see what it had to say
I grew up believing my art form of choice—writing—came from me. My mindset was individualistic. It was competitive.
By comparison, you can imagine your creativity stems from an outside “force.” The ancient Greeks, for instance, had their 9 Muses—goddesses who were said to inspire the popular art forms of the day,
Calliope was the Muse responsible for epic poetry. Urania was the force behind astronomy. Perhaps if modern society had such icons, we’d call upon Technope the DJing goddess, and Netflixia, the Muse of film & TV production!
Here’s what I notice so far from imagining my creativity has a…
I now practice “self-consent” to be sexually happier
From an early age, masturbation was shrouded in shame. This was a huge obstacle to me becoming sexually happy.
I don’t know what happened. Maybe an adult scolded me for self-touching when I was 4. All I remember is being 5 and in my bedroom, thinking about famous baseball players while scratch-a-scratch. My mom walked in to check on me. She thought my hot sweaty forehead meant I had a fever…
I knew that what I had just been doing was a deep, dark, shameful secret.
In middle school, I was teased for being presumably gay or trans, based on…
Sometimes a ghost’s goodbye hurts less than harsh words
Hey Tina! Last time we talked, you were saying we should get together and knit sometime. I’ve never knitted before; OMG, I’m so excited!
Silence.
How’s it going, bestie? 🤗 You know, I was just thinking about you this week when… *3 paragraphs later* and I hope you and the pet chinchillas are doing SO WELL!
My phone buzzes. Unfortunately, it’s just Sam with Working America. You know, my other friend.
Tina? You alive, girl? You vacationin’ on Venus and ran out of bars?
You have been ghosted.
I understand. Rejection hurts. You at least want to understand why. Because…
We all have reasons we get self-conscious in a live class. Don’t let that stop you.
I still cringe at the memory of a yoga class I took one day in downtown Tempe.
The class was fine, the instructor, great; I’m sure. But my brain is wont to recall the negative—like how I felt stupid, ungainly and embarrassed.
I had already been self-conscious walking in. My body’s unfortunate maleness is on extra display inside a studio, where we all bend and sway every which way with a teacher (not to mention mirrors) keeping vigil over our every move.
Will my yoga pants show a bulge when I bloom into Natarajasana? If I “fully let go” into…
Entertainment has been my default state. My new default state? Human connection.
As I type these words, I’m listening to music by Maná, a rock group from Guadalajara.
It’s been months since I’ve heard beats blare through the kitchen speakers. The reason I told Alexa to play songs instead of enjoying my usual silence was that it was a chance to connect with someone. Our housekeeper, who is the friendliest and great to talk to, was scrubbing around with me when I asked her:
Do you like to work with music in the background? What is one of your favorite musical artists or bands?
She likes Maná.
And now, after jamming out…
Give yourself the freedom to create imperfectly that you would wish upon your idol
If you’re stuck in perfectionism, imagine your biggest idol in the same pain. How would it feel to see them suffering the way you do?
What would you tell them? What would you say to reassure them they’re golden and should keep going?
I recently had a serendipitous meeting of a new friend. He is a Louisianan multipotentialite—my fancy way of saying he has many creative interests—and his fascinations span from acting, to music, tattoos, D&D, basketball, short story, game streaming, dance, and more. …
Phoenix Huber
I am an effusive Pollyanna and vegan trans woman. My passion is to be kind to all kinds.
